Vol 3. Chapter 16 - Constant change is here to stay (1980s)

Whilst still at the B&B my father got a job at an abattoir as an accountant.  Another move was necessitated to be nearer his place of employment.

Cornwall has many scars on its landscape. One such scar is to be found in Delabole. The Quarry there was once the deepest man-made pit in the world, Slate has been mined in Delabol since the reign of King Stephen, and not much has changed in the intervening 950 years.

Mum immediately fell in love with a bungalow named “Centaur”. (Move 17). It had a view of rolling fields at the back. Every room was beautifully decorated. Mum must have it and she must have it NOW. So keen was she to have it that they didn’t bother to have the house surveyed. They moved in during the summer but as winter drew near and the damp appeared, the beautiful new wallpaper began to peel off the walls.

There was nothing for it but for dad to redecorate and move. By now dad was working in Bodmin so move 18 took them to Foster Drive, Bodmin.

At Foster Drive my mother remembered a promise she’d made to her mother years before to look after her brother, my uncle Harry. So when Harry fell out with family members in Milton Keynes, my mother took him in. Mother does nothing by halves, when she takes someone on as a project she gives 110% even though it meant neglecting my father. The more she fussed and mothered Harry, the more angry and resentful my father became. Harry had to go! He eventually found sheltered accommodation for the elderly: a one bedroomed flat.

All went well at Foster drive until they fell out with some neighbours. Nothing for it but to move. Again they downsized – this time to a mobile home in the “Cornish Alps”(No. 19). Windy Ridge tells you all you need to know about what this place was like, if it wasn't also for the fact that it was situated in the middle of a Kaolin mine. The “Cornish Alps” refers to the white volcano shaped landscape. This bleak and bizarre landscape was the ideal location for any film set that required an alien moonscape. Dr. Who was once filmed there.

All the family gathered for Christmas 1987. Too small to accommodate us all, some stayed in B&B’s, but we stayed in a caravan in the back garden, one of the coldest experiences of my life. Not even sleeping with all your clothes on could keep the threat of hyperthermia at bay.

In 1988 my mother fell out with the man next door about where she parked her Mini. This luckily coincided with my mum’s brother, Harry, having “funny turns”.  Mum decided that Harry once again needed her as a full time Carer and so she and dad moved back to Bodmin and into Harry’s one bedroom flat, whether Harry wanted them to or not (No. 20).

A few weeks later Harry came home to discover that my mother had sold all his furniture (without asking him) and replaced it with her own.  Harry bewailed the situation to the warden of the sheltered housing where he lived. The warden reminded Harry that he was breaking the terms of his tenancy by having 3 people living there. Mum & Dad had to leave.

My kind hearted youngest sister took them in (No. 21) and learnt to her dismay that my mother didn't know the difference between being a guest in someone’s house and treating your house as her own. (Something we were to learn by bitter experience in years to come.)

September 1988 saw the approach of my parent’s 40^th wedding anniversary and my sisters and I prepared a surprise party for them and had a special cake made for the occasion. Mother’s paranoia meant that because she didn't know what was happening, then we must have forgotten. So, just days before the surprise party, my parents literally ran away. Disappeared. They cut off all communication with their children. None of us knew where they were. The party was cancelled but we enjoyed the cake.

Unbeknown to us, they travelled to Norfolk and went to live in a caravan (No. 22) just 35 miles from where I lived. But they still chose to cut us off without a word. But they made contact with my father's family, who kindly helped them find more permanent accommodation.

Eventually, at Christmas 1988, we received a phone call from them. They had moved into a small flat in York Road, Felixstowe (No. 23). This flat was owned by a charity for “Distressed Gentle Folk”.  The good people of this charity continued to support my parents until my father died, with gifts of fur coats, thermal underwear, blankets, sheets, pyjamas and moving expenses. As we shall in in Volume 4, the full extent of my parents’ fraud would only come to light after my father died. We went to visit them in their new flat. It was very “chilly” that Christmas!

Unfortunately this flat was upstairs and there was no lift. My mother found it difficult to manage the stairs. They had to move! Move 24 in 1989 was to Gainsborough Road, Felixstowe.

The Gainsborough Road property was a house that had been converted into 2 flats. The occupants had to share a front door and a back garden and washing line. My mother was never any good at sharing and did not get on with the lady who lived in the other flat. 

In 1990, they moved again. Move 25 took them just around the corner to Constable Road, Felixstowe.